6 Useful Tips To Control Anger Outbursts


A German proverb says, “He who has conquered his anger has conquered his enemy”. It is always better to stay in control of your anger; do not let it control you. Getting angry actually hurts your own soul much more than the people whom you are angry at. Read further about 6 tips that can be very useful in controlling your anger outbursts:

1. Breathe Deeply And Count Backward

Breathe DeeplyPhoto by Amanda Hirsch, CC BY 2.0

Getting angry is a normal emotion. What makes it bad is when it is vented out negatively. Anger is not punished, rather it punishes us. So try to tame it down instantly by taking 10 deep breaths and start counting backward from 10 to 1. This immediately gives you time for relaxation. That way, you can overcome the tendency to overreact in anger. Deep breathing calms down your angry mind and then you can think about more peaceful ways of coping with the situation.

2. Talking Rather Than Yelling

TalkPhoto by Matus Laslofi, CC BY-SA 2.0

Abstain from yelling out instantly when things are not being done according to you or when someone is pointing out a finger at you. Instead, try to talk to the person, maybe after a pause, about the root cause of the problem. Talking will not only give you an insight to the actual situation, it will also vent out your anger in a positive way without hurting you or anyone else. Many petty problems take an amplified form when they are not talked about and therefore misunderstood. If it is about some shortcoming in your personality, talk to a reliable and supportive friend. That way you can analyze and overcome your own negative traits fruitfully.

3. Think Before Reacting

ThinkPhoto by Jacob Bøtter, CC BY 2.0

For example, insult is a common trigger that will easily send anyone up the grump meter. The better part of this news is that insults are an external trigger. This means that we have the choice to think how to react to an insult. A good choice would be to stop and think for a while before reacting angrily. Our tongue leashes out anger in an irreversible fashion. The hurt cannot be undone. So, think beforehand about the best way to handle the situation is. You can always counter attack with firm statements like ‘I will not be able to perform if I am insulted’.

4. Apprehend And Stay Calm

Stay Calm

Photo by Vinoth Chandar, CC BY 2.0

Try to identify what triggers your anger. If you have a list of such early warning signs ready in your mind beforehand, it will make your work easier. In case, you feel that things are getting nearer to an angry situation, get ready in apprehension, and close the doors of your mind for angry feelings. Move away from the place for some time, or take your mind to an imaginary world where you can picture your favorite things or places or people. This kind of forecast will prevent things from slipping into the danger zone and you can very well avert angry outbursts.

5. Self Talk And Good Thinking

Self Talk

Photo by Andreas Schalk, CC BY 2.0

Our thoughts come out as words when we talk. If you are in the middle of something which is making your blood pressure shoot up with anger, take note of the things that caused you trouble. Later, try to talk to yourself mentally whether you can come up to a workable solution about it. For instance, if your colleague starts your day in office with nasty comments every day, make a list of balanced statements that you can use before, during and after an angry situation. If such conversations are going nowhere, ignore them completely. Positive attitude will definitely put in a win-win stance.

6. Analyze The Situation Later

Ask yourself several questions like “Why Was I angry”? “Was it correct to be angry”? “What went wrong”? Then, try to think how you could react differently if faced with a similar situation later. Anger can mess up things to a great extent. Instead, search for peaceful responses which will not cause harm to you and the other person facing the wrath too. A relaxed and stable mind performs wonderfully, even in stress. A regular practice of meditation can work wonders in helping to de-stress and analyzing life.

Make your anger expensive; so expensive that no one can afford it. Rather, make your happiness cheaper so that everyone around you can easily feel and enjoy it.